Random Thoughts: There Is No Number One Team

We are still early in the 2023 college football season and much is left to be decuded. But one thing is sure: There is no number one team. Georgia has faced three bad teams and looked pretty uninspired in the three victories. With the way Alabama is playing, Texas’s win over the Crimson Tide is not looking so grand anymore - especially with the way the Longhorns struggled against Wyoming. FSU probably should have lost to BC. Michigan has beaten three dog awful teams (ECU, UNLV, BGSU). Ohio State, Washington and Southern Cal have all had cupcakes upon cupcakes. The polls are a farce.

SEC

Alabama 17 South Florida 3 - A lot went wrong for the Tide in Tampa. Starting QB Tyler Buchner was awful. The Tide could not get much going offensively. Kool-Aid muffed a punt. Bama QBs got sacked 5 times. It rained. There was a 30 minute lightning delay. And for some reason all the fans, players, staffs, and refs were allowed back but the ABC camera operators were not. Thus, viewers were stuck with horrendous camera angles that would make a Jefferson-Pilot broadcast look like Days of Heaven.

Tight end CJ Dippre was the Tide’s leading receiver with his one catch of 45 yards. Roydell Williams came out of nowhere and started looking like Shaun Alexander with 129 rushing yards and a TD on 17 carries.

Florida 29 Tennessee 16 - The above video about says it all. The Gators were tough and the Vols had no fight in them. Joe Milton may be able to throw a pigskin a quarter mile, but he is no Hendon Hooker. After an interception set up one UF touchdown and a UT 3-and-out set up another one, the Gators were up 26-7 in no time. Florida’s Trevor Etienne had 172 rushing yards with a long of 62.

LSU 41 Mississippi State 14 - Jayden Daniels picked the MSU defense apart passing (30/34-361-2-0) and was also LSU’s leading rusher (64 yds, 2 TD). It was a fine performance but it spotlights his inconsistencies from game to game. MSU coach Zach Arnett and and OC Kevin Barbay continue to misuse All-SEC caliber QB Will Rogers (11/28-103-0-0). If I am Rogers, I am so outta Starkville after the season. The Bullies had 201 total yards in front of their home crowd.

Missouri 30 Kansas State 27 - A wild one in Columbia ended in an SEC record 61-yard field goal at the buzzer. For the record, K-State had two guys wearing jersey number 8 on the field during the kick and thus the flag was picked up. Had Mizz missed, they would have had another shot at it.

Georgia 24 South Carolina 14 - Spencer Rattler was Joe Montana in the first half (16/18, 152 yards, TD) but Joe Mantegna in the fourth quarter (3-19, 0 TD, 2 INT). The Gamecocks led 14-3 at halftime but gave up 21 unanswered in a winnable game.

Ole Miss 48 Georgia Tech 23 - Jaxson Dart passed for 251 and ran for 136 in a romp over the Yeller Jackets. OM’s Quinshon Judkins had another disastrous outing with just 37 yards on 13 carries. Former Bama WR Christian Leary had a career high 5 grabs and 64 yards for GT.

BYU 38 Arkansas 31 - After a touchdown drive on their first possession and a punt return for a second score, Arky was up 14-0. But their big lead was short-lived. In a tight back-and-forth game, Sedon Klovis found Chase Roberts for the catch of the week year that gave the Mormons a big road win over the Hogs.

SEC VS CUPCAKES

Kentucky 35 Akron 3 - Nothing

Texas A&M 47 UL Monroe 3 - to

Auburn 45 Samford 13 - see here

PSUEDO SEC

UNLV 40 Vanderbilt 37 - Vandy missed a 32-yarder with less than a minute left. Vegas hits a deep shot to Commodore 18. Runnin’ Rebs kicker made good on a 35-yarder with five seconds left for the upset win. It is probably time to relegate Vandy to the AAC and promote Memphis.

OTHER STUFF

Texas 31 Wyoming 10 - After watching Alabama’s continued struggles, a thought entered that Quinn Ewers may have just had a “Stephen Garcia” moment in Tuscaloosa two Saturdays ago. Ewers performance against the Cowboys this past Saturday seems to reinforce that notion. The Texas QB was a tepid 11 of 21 for 131 yards and 2 TDs and he had -5 yards rushing. One of his scoring connections was ALL Xavier Worthy (see above). It was a 10-10 tie in the 4th quarter until Worthy’s big play. A 61 yard run set up another touchdown and a Longhorns pick six extended the scoring to 31-10 in a game that was much much closer than the final score indicates.

Penn State 30 Illinois 13 - All anyone wanted to talk about coming into this game was how amazing PSU QB Drew Allar was. On Saturday, he was pretty pedestrian passing 16/33 for 208 yards and no scores. The reason for the big win was the FOUR interceptions gifted by IU QB Luke Altmyer that put the Litany Nyons in great field position all day long. The former Ole Miss signal caller, Altmyer, found a nice comfy spot on the bench after three quarters.

North Carolina 31 Minnesota 13 - Can you imagine the fortunes of Alabama had Drake Maye kept to his commitment to sign with the Tide? Both he and the Tide would have A LOT fewer losses on their resumes. The UNC passer threw for a season-high 414 yards to go with two touchdowns and two picks. Despite the turnovers, the Tar Heels managed 519 yards of offense and 26 first downs. Minnie is starting to rival Iowa in that great struggle to score points, averaging 17 ppg.

Colorado 43 Colorado State 35 (2 OT) - In a game that started at 10pm ET, this one went late in the night and into double overtime. A few coaching blunders moves by CSU cost them the upset over the Hype Machine. The Rams blew a 11-point fourth-quarter lead, giving up a game-tying touchdown plus two-point conversion with 36 seconds to go in regulation. After CSU easily scored a TD at the end of the second half of the first OT, they had a chance to go for the game-winning two-point conversion. Jay Norvell said he thought about it but elected to kick the extra point instead. It was the last time the Rams would score in the game.

Of course the moronic Colorado fans rushed the field. Congratulations for beating a winless team who hasn’t won more than 4 games in a season since 2017 who you were favored to beat by 23.5 on your home field in double overtime.

HOT SEAT

South Alabama 33 Oklahoma State 7 - We have a new member of the HOT SEAT CLUB. Mike Gundy is still a man but he isn’t 40 anymore. The 56-year old is in his 19th season in Stillwater and his act might be getting a little stale. Through three games, Gundy has employed the odd strategy of rotating three quarterbacks, including his son Gunnar, to poor effect. Nick Saban thinks it might be time to name a starter.

Maryland 42 Virginia 14 - UVa led 14-0 and then it all fell apart. Tony Elliott is not helping his cause with meltdowns like this.

West Virginia 17 Pitt 6 - The Backyard Brawl was back for Year 2 of a 4-year contract and Neal Brown got a much-needed win over a rival. Pitt and WVU both gained a 211 yards each in a an ugmo game. I have to admit it, though. I kinda like these WVU uniforms. Watcha think?

Rutgers 35 Virginia Tech 16 - The Hokies fumbled on the second play of the game and the Scarlet Knights punched it in for an early 7-0 lead and never trailed. VT was without their two starting wide receivers and starting their quarterback. Michigan is next for Rutgers.

Washington 41 Michigan State 7 - This whole Mel Tucker issue smells a bit fishy. The suspended MSU coach has a whopping $86.6 million buyout unless he is fired for doing something awful - like having a 36 minute phone sex call in which the accuser (a “sexual harassment expert”) never thought to hand up the phone? Sparty was probably going to get smoked by the Huskies and Michael Penix even with Tucker on the sidelines.

Arkansas State 31 Stony Brook 7 - After being outscored 110-3 in their first two games, the Red Wolves picked up their first win of the season against a college named after a porn star.

NOT REALLY POWER-5

Sacramento State 30 Stanford 23 - It must suck when you have 11 Tuf Borlands on the field. Enjoy that, ACC. [Ironically, Cardinal head coach Troy Taylor was head coach at Sac State the last three seasons where he built them into an FCS power, so they could beat teams like Stanford.]

FAT GUY TOUCHDOWN OF THE WEEK

REMEMBER THIS STEPHEN GARCIA?

Yeah. Now he’s at Incarnate Word.

IT’S A GOOD THING GREG BYRNE ISN’T AD AT WVU!

FISHIEST ENDING OF THE WEEK

With as much trouble Iowa is in with student-athletes gambling, you would think maybe there may be a little more awareness as to the spread as compared to the score when they are up big. The Hawkeyes were leading Western Michigan 34-10 when they got the ball back with 3:12 to go. The game’s victor was no longer in doubt and WMU was not trying to stop the clock. But Iowa was passing the ball trying to score. On 4th & goal with 33 second remaining, there are three options: take a knee, kick a field goal, or try to score a touchdown. Iowa opted for the third option. And how fortunate for Las Vegas, because the spread was -28.5 and the choice they made meant Iowa covered, winning by 31. The other two options would meant not covering - field goal 27, knee 24.

MORE HIJINKS IN CORN COUNTRY

UPON FURTHER REVIEW: This sure looked like a good field goal. While ISU was favored by 2.5, this “miss” in a tight low-scoring game would prove crucial as Ohio got the upset, 10-7.

MOST RIDICULOUS PENALTY OF THE WEEK

MASCOT OF THE WEEK

D-II Delta State officially call themselves the Statesmen. However in recent years, they have adopted the monicker of the Fighting Okra and I love it. DSU defeated FCS Mississippi Valley State 35-7.

LAWD

LAME P5 FAN BASE OF THE WEEK

Miami again. Go figure.

LAME NON-P5 FAN BASE OF THE WEEK

Partly Cloudy and 69° in Buffalo. No excuses.

SEC ‘BOUT TO GET A BIG FAT CHECK!

Missouri was fined $100K for their post-game field rush. Next offense is $250,000 fine. Subsequent offenses will be $500,000 a pop.

This one may have deserved a field rush. An incredible unlikely 61-yard field goal at the buzzer against the defending Big 12 Champs and ranked K-State in a renewed rivalry game? Yeah, go ahead. Rush your little hearts out.

Some folks think the fines are ridiculous and the SEC is being “no fun”. But one of these days, someone is going to bust their ass and then the blame game starts. It just unfortunate that this has become a trend due to some stupid schools like LSU last season for beating... Ole Miss. Really, LSU??

Sadly, Mizz and K-State are not scheduled for any further match-ups. The Tigers already have their OOC opponents lined up through 2033.

UGMO UNIFORMS OF THE WEEK

FSU channeling UMass. And played like them too.

SADDEST UNIFORMS OF THE WEEK

Bethune-Cookman came thiiiis close || to having Ed Reed as their coach, but bull-headed attitudes from both sides ended that relationship. Reed probably would have gotten donations needed to fix this program, mentally and financially.

NAME OF THE WEEK

FIU tight end Rowdy Beers.

LEBRON FAN OF THE WEEK

WELCOME BACK, JEFFERSON-PILOT!

ABC/ESPN wanted to be ready just in case there was a 30-yard sack or if some fan ran on the field.

TAKING PREVENT DEFENSE A BIT TOO FAR

FYI, this was just some random fan dressed out like he was on the team.

NOT HERE FOR THE FOOTBALL OR THE ACADEMICS

NOT SO FAST, MY FRIEND

GOD COMPLEX OF THE WEEK

STATIONARY RUNNING BACK OF THE WEEK

• Troy running back Kimani Vidal gained 27 yards on 11 carries against JMU. Thanks to -44 sack yards, the Trojans had -12 rushing yards for the game.

OFFENSIVE OFFENSE

• Pitt QB Phil Jurkovec completed only 8 of 20 for 81 yards and threw three interceptions. He was the only quarterback to play for the Panthers against West Virginny.

STATS OF THE WEEK

• Georgia State’s Darren Grainger threw 27/33 for 466 yards and 3 scores in a win against Charlotte.
• No home cookin’ for Boston College when they are playing the darling of the conference FSU. The Eagles were flagged 18 times for 131 yards. The Seminoles penalized only 5 times.
• Syracuse QB Garrett Shrader (formerly of Missy State) was the week’s leading rusher with 195 yards and 4 TDs versus Purdue. He’ll make a fine NFL tight end some day.
• Malik Nabers has almost a third (24) of LSU’s 77 completed passes. Brian Thomas is right behind him with 20 grabs. Those numbers represent 57% of all of the Tigers’ receptions. The pair were targeted 21 of 37 times against MSU. For the season, 57 of the 108 team passes have been aimed at this duo. Jayden Daniels is not much for going through progressions, huh?

GAMEDAY SIGN OF THE WEEK

Legend.

THE WACKY WORLD OF DESI

Was this the final farewell for Lee Corso on College GameDay?

It’s a little dusty in here... Love them or hate them, Corso and GD have been a part of the college football lore.

College GameDay will be in South Bend, Indiana, for the Ohio State vs. Notre Dame matchup. FOX’s Big Noon Kickoff heads to Cincinnati as the Bearcats prepare to get slaughtered by Oklahoma. Cincy just lost to Miami-OH at home. SEC Nation will be spotlighting Auburn at Texas A&M in College Station.

ADOPT-A-TEAM

• Fresno has topped Purdue and Arizona State.
• Memphis has ticket promotion where fans had to buy a $60 ticket for opener vs. Bethune-Cookman. When the Tigers won, fans got free ticket to next home game. And this continues for each home game until Memphis loses at home. 200 fans took them up on it and will be heading to their third game vs Boise on Sept 30.
• Washington State is becoming an interesting story. The misfit toy on PAC-2 Island is 3-0. They play fellow left-behinder Oregon State this Saturday. Both could turn into major spoilers this season.
• Someone recently had a good adopt suggestion in Comments but I can’t recall who the team was. If you made a recent suggestion, please pop it back in there.

COUSINS

• South Alabama (2-1) - The Jags absolutely THUMPED Oklahoma State in the Cowboys stadium 33-7. TheOSU managed only 208 yards and punted 9 times. Central Michigan (1-2) travels to Mobile as a 15 point underdog.
• Troy (1-2) - Trojans hung with upstart James Madison in a tight battle but ultimately fell 16-14. Troy QB had 332 passing yards but was sacked 6 times. TU (-3) welcomes in 2-1 Western Kentucky who hung with anOhio State for a quarter.
• Jacksonville State (2-1) - You wanted JSU highlights? Here ya go: they lost. Coastal Carolina took their lunch money 30-16. Next is Eastern Michigan - a game the Gamecocks (-6) should win.

THAT ANNOYING GUY WHO PUTS HIS PHONE ON SPEAKER WHILE SHOPPING THE PIGGLY WIGGLY

• UAB (1-2) - The Dragons trailed 41-3 in the fourth quarter against ULL. They scored some late TDs against some Laffy back-ups to make the final score of 41-21 look a little closer. Trent Dilfer’s tenure is off to a rocky start. Birmingham U will move to 1-3 after this Saturday’s game at UGA (-41). Then, they travel to Tulane. Woof!

SALUTE TO OUR TROOPS

• Navy (1-2) - The Midshipmen had their best showing of the young season against Memphis, but the game ended at the Tigers’ 10 yard line when a fourth down Navy pass came up a yard short. UM 28, USNA 24. After two weeks as a back-up, Alex Tecza finished with 163 rushing yards and a score on 15 carries. I think we may see more of him in the future. If Navy continues to play like this, I could see them beating the next three opponents: USF, N. Texas, @Charlotte. But first, they have a week off of R and R.

• Army (2-1) - With UTSA’s fourth year starting QB Frank Harris injured and not playing, the Black Knights provided all the offense, scoring on their first six possessions and won 37-29 on the road. Army’s attack sliced and diced the Roadrunners defense for 442 yards of offense and 23 first downs while chewing up 44:25 of 60 minutes of play. A late 8-pointer by UTSA made it look closer than it was. In an interesting twist, Army operated their offense mostly from shotgun as opposed to under center as they have done for the last 130+ years. A trip to Syracuse (-13.5) is now on tap. The Orangemen are always dangerous in September.
• Air Force (3-0) - The Falcons recorded touchdowns on their first four possessions and led Utah State 29-0 before the Aggies could get on the scoreboard. AFA won 39-21 with 428 yards of offense. The first road trip of the season takes them to San Jose Canseco State as a 3.5 point favorite.

ELIMINATED FROM PLAYOFF CONTENTION

Eliminated: All non-P5s, Boston College, Virginia, Texas Tech, Baylor, Houston, Nebraska, Northwestern, Purdue, Illinois, Indiana, Northwestern, Arizona State, Arizona, Stanford, Cal, Vanderbilt. NEW: Sparty, Minnie, Pitt, Virginia Tech, Georgia Tech, Iowa State, Cincinnati, Oklahoma State, South Carolina

Endangered: Clemson, TCU, BYU, Center Florida, Rutgers, Texas A&M, Florida, Auburn, LSU, Mizzou NEW: Arkansas, Tennessee, Kansas State

Extremely Endangered: NC State, Wisconsin, West Virginia NEW: Alabama, Mississippi State

A way WAY WAY too early look at the College Football Playoff (CFP) picture:

DraftKings odds to win the 2023 National Championship:

1. Georgia +220 to+240 to +230 (bet $100 to win $230)
2. Michigan +800 to +750 to +700 to +475 to +400
3. Texas +2200 to +1000
4. Ohio State +700 to +750 to +900 +1200 to +1000
5. FSU +2000 to +1100 +1000 drop to +1200
6. Southern Cal +1500 to +1600 to +1500 stays at +1400
7. Penn State +2200 to +1800 to +1600
8. Notre Dame +3500 to +2800 to +2200 to +1600

• Alabama +600 to +550 to +2500 to +4000
• LSU +1100 to +3500 to +3500 to +3000
• Clemson +1800 to +7500 to +8000 to +6000
• Texas A&M +12000

Odds/lines subject to change. T&Cs apply. See draftkings.com/sportsbook for details.

• ACC - Florida State holds a tenuous lead after almost losing to doormat BC. Miami-FL and UNC meet Oct 14. Louisville has Notre Dame on the horizon.
• Big 12 - It’s Texas at the top. Okie is blowing MFers away but all cupcakes.
• Big Ten - anOSU, Michigan, and PSU haven’t really played anyone.
• PAC-12 - Southern Cal with Washington and Oregon, maybe the Utes.
• SEC - Georgia looking uninspired. Alabama, LSU, and Tennessee all already have one loss each. Ole Miss plays Bama.
• Indies - Notre Dame (4-0) hosts anOhio State.
• Non-Power 5

RANK ‘EM IF YOU GOT ‘EM

The AP voters joyfully pushed Alabama all the way down to #13 and then all had cigarettes as they cuddled with their laptops. Instead of listing the rest of the rankings, that really did not change, below are the Highest Buyouts For College Coaches:

1. Kirby Smart, Georgia, Head Football Coach ($103.1 million buyout)
2. Jimbo Fisher, Texas A&M, Head Football Coach ($86.7 million buyout)
3. Mel Tucker, Michigan State, Head Football Coach ($86.6 million buyout)
4. Brian Kelly, LSU, Head Football Coach ($78.6 million buyout)
5. James Franklin, Penn State, Head Football Coach ($72.6 million buyout)
6. Dabo Swinney, Clemson, Head Football Coach ($64 million buyout)
7. Ryan Day, Ohio State, Head Football Coach ($52.4 million buyout)
8. Nick Saban, Alabama, Head Football Coach ($43.2 million buyout)
9. Brent Venables, Oklahoma, Head Football Coach ($36.5 million buyout)
10. John Calipari, Kentucky, Head Basketball Coach ($33.3 million buyout)

* Lincoln Riley’s buyout is believed to be over $90 million based on his current compensation that has been made public. As a private school, Southern Cal is not required to release such information.

The initial 2023 College Football Playoff rankings will be released on Nick Saban’s 72nd birthday, October 31, 2023.

LET’S GO BOWLING!

• Of the 131 FBS teams eligible for the post season, only 39 are still undefeated.
• Notre Dame is the only 4-0 team. Marshall is 2-0.

LET’S GO BLOWING!

• The following teams are winless after three games: East Carolina, Virginia, UConn, Buffalo, and Nevada. Sam Houston and Colorado State are 0-2.
• Sam Houston has scored three points thus far in their maiden voyage into FBS.
• After three weeks, all 12 MAC teams have at least one defeat.

Krazy Kristi’s “SHUT UP!” of the Week soon-to-be former Wisconsin WR Keontez Lewis and his kind. After two weeks into the season and he is already entering the Transfer Portal because he is not getting the ball enoughfire him ca. Lewis arrived at Wisconsin as a transfer from UCLA before last season. To paraphrase the NCAA PSA, the vast majority of college athletes will go pro in something other than sports. This guy is not making the NFL and probably not any other paid football league. So what does he think a potential employer at a REAL job is going to think when they see three (or more) colleges on his resume?

HEISMAN HYPE

Below are just some of the top Heisman picks in order of the money lines. Note all the candidates who are in their sixth year of college football. If not for the idiocy of Mark Emmert and the NCAA trying to curry favor, these guys would be out of eligibility.

Odds are provided by DraftKings on the “AWARDS” tab.

1. QB Caleb Williams (JR, Southern Cal) +450 to +400 to +380 - The Trojans did not play this past weekend. (San Jose, Nevada, Stanford)
2. QB Michael Penix (6th YR, Washington) from +1600 to +900 to +550 - Penix has some big numbers, but UW has not really played any team of merit so far (Boise, Tulsa, Sparty).
3. QB Quinn Ewers (RS-SO, Texas) +1300 to +900 to +700
4. QB Sam Hartman (6th YR, Notre Dame) fell from +1600 to +2000 to +1100
5. QB Jordan Travis (6th YR, FSU) from +1400 to +900 to +1500
6. QB Shedeur Sanders (JR, Colorado) +1800

• QB Jayden Daniels (5th YR, LSU) +1100 to +3000 to +2200
• Ty Simpson, Jalen Milroe, Jase McClellan are all +12000. Don’t waste your money.

[Odds/lines subject to change. T&Cs apply. See draftkings.com/sportsbook for details.]

THE SICK REPORT

• After taking a hard hit, Colorado’s Travis Hunter was taken to hospital for evaluation. Coach Deion Sanders said the “first thing I heard is he’s going to be out a few weeks.” The Buffs play Oregon and Southern Cal the next two weeks.
• Georgia star wide receiver Ladd McConkey has yet to play this season as he continues to battle a back injury.
• Bowling Green linebacker Demetrius Hardamon is in stable condition and cleared to walk, a day after an “orthopedic injury” led to him being placed on a backboard and onto a stretcher and then carted off the field at Michigan Stadium on Saturday.

DRAMA

• This past week, California lawmakers voted to end travel bans to states that had what they perceived to be anti-LGBTQ+ laws. Among those 26 states are Florida, Georgia, Indiana, Iowa, Kentucky, Nebraska, North Carolina, Ohio, South Carolina, and Texas. Hmm. Now, why would they go and do a thing like that?
• For their parts in the post-game scuffle, offensive lineman Damieon George (formerly of Alabama), offensive lineman Micah Mazzccua, and tight end Dante Zanders of Florida will be suspended for the first half of the Gators’ game with Charlotte on Saturday in Gainesville. Defensive lineman Omarr Norman-Lott of Tennessee will be suspended for the first half of the Volunteers’ game with UTSA on Saturday in Knoxville.
• Ole Miss defensive tackle DeSanto Rollins, who said he was recently kicked off the team for missing practices and meetings during a “mental health crisis,” is suing the university and coach Lane Kiffin for “failure to provide equal protection, racial and sexual discrimination”, and multiple other allegations, according to the lawsuit filed last Thursday. Give me a break.

KOACHES KORNER

• As you surely have head by now, Colorado State coach Jay Norvell took a swing at Deion Sanders saying, “I don’t care if they hear it in Boulder. I told them, I took my hat off and I took my glasses off. I said when I talk to grown ups, I take my hat off and my glasses off. That’s what my mother taught me. (Colorado’s) not going to like us no matter what we say or do.” When told of this, Sanders retorted that “it was just gonna be a good game, but they done messed around and made it personal.” This is just the kind of thing Sanders feeds on. But he may have overeaten, because that game was a lot closer than most everyone thought it would be. Sanders showed his coaching inexperience by letting the media egg him on while sacrificing focus on the challenge ahead. He could learn a lot from Nick Saban. He would have feigned knowledge of the quote and acted like it was no big deal.
• In a shocking development, Lincoln Riley is a big fat liar. During a recent sit-down interview, the current Southern Cal coach claimed that after he took the Trojans job, he had “multiple, a lot of different people try and break into the house (in Oklahoma)”. A spokesman for the Norman (Okl.) Police Department told a reporter at The Oklahoman that there were no break-in reports at Riley’s house in November or December of 2021. Riley took the job on November 28 of that year. I’M A VICTIM!
• Michigan State sent Mel Tucker a letter stating that they intend to fire with .
• Army is extending football coach Jeff Monken through the 2027 season. His salary is an average of more than $2 million annually.
• Urban Meyer’s therapist told him that even people who he thinks are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to his face. He found this notion to be true when he went home and pushed his neighbor’s kid down the stairs.
• The University of Tennessee recovered 2 GB of storage after deleting a photo of Fat F*** Phil Fulmer off their website.

TEEVEE

Fox Sports is taking some serious heat for their lame and unprofessional remote broadcast of the Maryland-Virginia game aired on FS1. Trying to save money, Fox had announcers Eric Collins and Devin Gardner calling the game from a remote studio location. Problem was, these poor guys can only call what they see on monitors. Due to terrible production, lack of replays, and no sideline reporter, they were often lost to the game action. Most importantly, they did not notice that UVa was warming up a different QB to start the game. The crew struggled to identify players and missed many calls. Chief among then was the Cavaliers turning a 4th & long into a first down via penalty that caught them by surprise.

It was a Friday night game with two middling teams, but it was a game involving two state-bordering teams and former ACC rivals. It was also one of only three games on the night. Viewers deserve better.

THIS WEEK

(Below is an abbreviated list of highlighted games of interest with lines provided by DraftKings. If you REALLY need to know about the big Texas A&M-Commerce-Old Dominion showdown, you can find the details here.)

Thursday, September 21

Georgia State at Coastal Carolina (-6.5) 6:30/7:30 ESPN - No respect for 3-0 GSU!

Friday, September 22

Lotsa road team favorites. Steer clear.

Wisconsin (-7) at Purdue 6pm/7pm FS1
NC State (-9) at Virginia 6:30/7:30 ESPN
Boise (-7) at Carmen San Diego State 9:30/10:30 CBSSN
Air Force (-3.5) at San Jose Canseco State 9:30/10:30 FS1

Saturday, September 23

SEC

Auburn at Texas A&M (-7) 11am/Noon ESPN
Kentucky (-14) at Vanderbilt 11am/Noon SECN
UTSA at Tennessee (-20) 3pm/4pm SECN
Arkansas at LSU (-18) 6pm/7pm ESPN
Charlotte at Florida (-28) 6pm/7pm ESPN+
UAB at Georgia (-40) 6:30/7:30 ESPN2 - The cupcake parade rolls merrily along.
Memphis at Missouri (-6.5) 6:30/7:30 ESPNU - Two suddenly hot teams face off in St. Louis.
Mississippi State at South Carolina (-4.5) 6:30/7:30 SECN

OTHERS WORTH A PEEK

Florida State (-1.5) at Clemson 11am/Noon ABC - A new sheriff in the ACC?
Colorado at Oregon (-16.5) 2:30/3:30 ABC - Deion first BIG test.
Ohio State (-3) at Notre Dame 6:30/7:30 NBC - Possible eliminator
Iowa at Penn State (-14) 6:30/7:30 CBS - Definite eliminator
Texas (-14.5) at Baylor 6:30/7:30 ABC

TO SLEEP, PERCHANCE TO DREAM

Cal at Washington (-21) 9:30/10:30 ESPN
New Mexico State at Hawaii (-3) 11:59 PM Alohavision

SABAN vs. POP & BEAR

G.O.A.T.

Below is a count of career FBS/Division I-A win totals for coaches.

For those of you new to RBR Random Thoughts, we count all on-field wins at the FBS/Division I-A level. So, before you go squawking about Frank Beamer, 42 of his wins came at Murray State. Mack Brown had six victories in one season with Appalachian State when they were still in what was known at I-AA (FCS today). Brian Kelly won 118 games with something called Grand Valley State. So, let’s stop talking about his win record with such reverence. In addition, we don’t recognize NCAA sanctioned forfeits. If you won on the field, it counts in our books.

Mack Brown’s Tar Heels move to a precarious 3-0. UNC is favored by 6.5 at Pitt.

If Alabama is going to roll with Jalen Milroe, put some frickin’ run plays in for him!

#ALABAMA

• Asked how he planned to prepare for Alabama Ole Miss coach Lane Kiffin quipped “Well it’s good to know Bryce won’t be there.”
• Before the USF game, DL Jaheim Oatis was seen wearing a walking boot on his left foot. He did not play. Oatis practiced on Monday.
• Left guard Tyler Booker missed the South Florida game with back spasms. It appears he will play against Ole Miss. Even though he didn’t play, Booker was still one of three Alabama team captains on Saturday. Terrence Ferguson started in his stead.
• Wide receiver and kick returner Kendrick Law did not make the trip to Tampa. He stayed behind with what was called an “illness”. Saban stated that Law was “very sick” but that he thought he should be okay for the coming week.
• Alabama had a players-only meeting after the game at USF. We’ll see if it did any good.

GAME 4: Saturday, September 23, 2023

Ole Miss Rebels (3-0) at Alabama Crimson Tide (2-1)

Tuscaloosa, AL ~ 2:30/3:30 CBS

• Ole Miss is 3-0 on the young season with wins over Mercer, @Tulane, and Georgia Tech led by QB Jaxson Dart. All-SEC running back Quinshon Judkins is averaging 3.3 ypc and 48.3 ypg.
• Head Coach Lane Kiffin is 0-4 against Saban in his career and wants nothing more than to beat his dad/mentor/former boss.
• Alabama is 58-10-2 all-time against OM with a current winning streak of seven games in the series.
• The T-town weather forecast calls for mostly sunny skies and a high of 86°.
• TV Announcers will be Brad Nessler and our ol’ friend Gary Danielson with Jenny Dell on the sidelines in their final season of “SEC on CBS.”
• Eli Gold will be back on the mic for Alabama Radio, but it has been a struggle.
• Legendary Tide players RB Johnny Musso and QB Scott Hunter will be honorary team captains.
• Alabama will honor the Crimson Tide Final 4 Soccer team with a ring presentation for their 2022 SEC Championship.
• Early reports had the opening point spread at Bama favored by 11.5. However that number quickly dropped several points. DraftKings has Alabama as a -6.5 favorite as of post. The Over/Under is 55.

Odds/lines subject to change. T&Cs apply. See draftkings.com/sportsbook for details.